Another Milestone Passed: Security Clearance

I just found out that I got my security clearance. Yippee! Yes, this old broad is jumping about and clapping her hands like a three-year-old. Well, not physically. But she sure is mentally.

I am soooo relieved and happy. According to Customer Service I actually received clearance on January 7, 2011. That's 12 days ago, folks! Twelve days in which I worried and fretted and told myself that a watched pot never boils.

But am I on the Register? That's the next question, isn't it? Have I been officially placed on the Register?

Stay tuned for updates ...

(She floats off, singing in the background.)

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UPs aNd dOwns

Last week, I calls DSS to check the status of my security clearance. I already knew from a previous call that they were going to miss my target date of January 4th, because of a "lead pending.' That news had upset me as I knew from the A-100 board that "lead pending" could translate into months of waiting just for the information-gathering part of the process to complete. So I was quite encouraged to learn, with that last phone call, that this phase of my case had been completed after all, albeit one or two days late.

The next step would be the decision as to whether my case would go straight to Final Suitability Review or face the dreaded detour of Adjudications. I read on the A-100 board that a majority of the cases do end up going through adjudications. That can add merely days or, unfortunately, months to the processing time. Even more unfortunately, that's where a candidacy can reach a final and irrevocable end. (If adjudications turns you down, you can appeal, but statistics, apparently are not in your favor.)

During that last phone call, the customer service representative recommended that I call back today for an update. I've been praying for good news, but trying to prepare myself for bad. Of course, trying to prepare yourself for bad news never works. It just means you spent time worrying.

Still, I was OK. And then I did something really dumb, something I know I shouldn't do. I went back to the A-100 boards to see if there was information about class sizes and whether invitations for classes had been sent out. I also wanted to check the Shadow Register* to see how long it was and the scores of those who had received invitations.

A little voice told me not to do it. Did I listen? Nope.

The Shadow Register shows that the list of waiting hopefuls in the consular track is up to 180; it's even higher for other tracks. The class sizes are down, but could be inching up again. However, the lowest score of the last people called was 5.7. Up until about a month ago, a score of 5.7 put you in the 20s on the Register.** Now, people with a 5.7 are dropping "down" to the 30s. Even as recently as late 2009, a score of 5.4 was more than enough to net an invitation to the A-100. With a 5.7, you were a shoe-in. Around the beginning of 2010, that began to change. People with a 5.7 were beginning to have to sit, and wait. As time went by, the wait got longer. Now, at the head of 2011, a score of 5.4 just means you have the privilege of sitting on the Register. It also means that you have almost no chance of getting the job. And a 5.7 seems to mean that you have only a slightly better chance of getting the job. 

Upsetting? You bet. I tell myself that with a 5.7 it's still just a waiting game. That if you hold on long enough, you will inch up the queue; they will get around to you. I tell myself that, but I'm not sure I believe it.

In their desperation, people are going through the process again and again, signing up to take the written test, pushing through to the essays to score that invitation to the OA again. They're pumping themselves up to go through that nerve-wracking marathon day of testing, hoping to increase their base score. At the same time, they're using their savings to sign up for intensive language courses -- Turkish, Chinese, Russian, what have you -- whatever could snare them an extra 0.4 points.

I'm seeing incredible scores on the Shadow Register: 5.8 and 6. This morning, one of the Shadow Registers (I forget which one), showed a score of 6.15. This person might have had language plus veterans' points. Now, of course, a score such as 6 or higher is rare, but the 5.7s, 5.8s and 5.9s are becoming less rare. There seem to be more and more of them and the rate at which even they are receiving invitations is slowing down.

The last time someone with a 5.4 got an invitation to an A-100 seems to have been last April, according to the Shadow Register.

I should forget about the 5.4s you say? After all, I'm going to pass my language test and get those bonus points, aren't I? I wish I could be that confident. I can speak "my" foreign language well enough to enjoy everyday conversation. But I have neither the vocabulary nor the confidence in my grammar to handle complex subjects such as current events. And they ask you about that stuff on the phone test.

I was very depressed this morning after visiting the board. I thought about my much anticipated phone call to DSS, the one I'm to make this afternoon. And an inner voice said, "It won't matter what the outcome is, will it? Because even with a 5.7, your chances of getting this job are just short of zero."

So, yes, I'm down today. Very down. And as I sit here, I can barely read what I'm typing. My sight is bleary with tears.

I'm so tired of struggling. If this door closes to me, I don't know what I'll do.

*   The Shadow Register is an attempt by the folks on the A-100 to duplicate the official Register. The information on the Shadow Register is totally dependent on people voluntarily submitting their information. Many participants do not participate, however; others share their information initially but do not always update it. So, the Shadow Register varies in its accuracy. However, I've never seen anyone who got into the A-100 come back to the board and say the impression the Shadow Register conveyed was totally off track.
** Your rank reflects where you are in line for an A-100 invitation. So a rank of 1 means you're first in line; a rank of 20 means you're twentieth and so on.

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Great News Today: Medical Clearance Granted

The headline says it all. I checked my emails late today and found the great news. And do I feel relieved? Oh, boy, you betcha!

For some folks, getting medical clearance is as easy as falling off a log. For me, well ... it meant a lot of repeat visits to doctors, extra tests -- and an extra form. Plus, there were my kids to get taken care of. So, when I got that email, I sighed a very deep sigh of relief and sent up an extra special prayer of gratitude.

One more step -- one major step -- nearer to becoming an FSO. I am so happy. What a relief!

Now, for the security clearance. My target date is January 4, 2011. To tell you the truth, I'm not sure what that stands for. Is it the date by which all information-gathering must be done and my file submitted or is it the date by which a final decision is made? I have a feeling it's the first. Which means more wait time after the "target date." Sigh.

I would love to start the New Year with a security clearance. Wouldn't that be grand?

I must admit that I've been down a bit lately. I stopped reading the FSO blogs, which I'd come to love, and I've stayed away from the A-100 forum. Especially, the later. Why? Because "listening" to people worry about when they'll get an invitation to the next A-100 classes depresses me. I envy them. I'm not proud of it, but it's true. I wish I was at the point where my main worry was about getting an invitation. It would mean that I had my clearance and was on the Register.

I will be soooo grateful when that day comes!

In the meantime, I've scheduled my language test for mid-January. I don't plan to really "study, just to refresh my skills. Toward that end, I plan to start reading in German (books and online newspapers); I'll also resume listening to Deutsche Welle on iTunes, as well as talk to my son in German. (He speaks it fluently.) I don't want to make a big to-do out of this. I'll only end up making myself nervous.

For now though, I have a novel to finish and a contest to judge and literally fifty+plus novels to read within the next four weeks. I'll plow my way through that and keep praying that my security clearance goes through smoothly.

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84 BOA: A Trip Down Memory Lane, Sleep, Miscellany

The folks in my study group are slowly, trickling down to DC for their Oral Assessments and I'm beginning to wish I'd schedded mine for next month instead of October. I feel prepared now. I feel prepped now. And I'm beginning to want to "get it over with," while I still feel positive and energized.

However, on close examination, I realize that there's still a lot of preparations I want to make: work on the Case Management exercise, for example. And study the projects so I get used to reading and understanding them for the Group Exercise. Digger, the FSO behind Life After Jerusalem, kindly left a comment the other day, urging me to focus on the numbers involved in the projects. He's correct. The numbers -- understanding them, explaining them -- are the hardest part of the GE exercise for me. I also have to think more about my anecdotes, and of course, write my Statement of Interest.

I have begun work on my security clearance form -- the one you hand in when you show up for your orals. Whether or not it comes into play depends, of course, on whether you actually pass them. I was nervous when I began filling out the form, afraid I would make a mistake, but after a time I began to enjoy it. It was a walk down Memory Lane. Wow! The people I've known; the places I've been; the jobs I've had! It was interesting seeing it all slowly accumulate as I remembered this and that, that and this. Even after I paused work on the form, my mind continued to consider it, remembering bits and pieces.

You may have picked up that I'm feeling more hopeful now. I keep hearing that the Oral Assessments are essentially a personality test. One woman reported on the Yahoo FSOA Group that she actually passed the OA, despite having failed the Group Exercises and Case Management sections. She was strongly prepared for her Structured Interview and passed it. She must have done more than pass it, obviously. She must have aced it.

I intend to pass everything, but I feel better knowing that all would not be lost, even if I failed two out of the three sections.

What's the best strategy? To play to one's strengths? Or be generally good at everything? Up until now, I thought the second would be the best. However, now I worry about being a jack-of-all trades, master-of-none, at least as far as the OAs are concerned. At the same time, it doesn't make ake much sense to place all of your eggs in one basket. It does make sense to have a well-rounded preparation that enables you to pick up points in your weaker areas, while you shine in your one area of "expertise," or at least feel most confident.

Enough strategizing. As you see, thoughts about the OA are "taking over." I don't feel nervous, though. I really don't. I wonder if I've proceeded to the next step mentally, where I'm feeling numb. One guy on the Yahoo board said he was so emotionally exhausted by the time he got to his OA, he was so convinced that he was going to fail, that he completely relaxed -- and passed.

We'll see. Each of us is constructed somewhat differently. But I totally understand what this guy was talking about. And I can see something like that happening to me. I've already reached the point where I tell myself that no matter what the outcome, I feel honored and blessed to be included in such a wonderful group of candidates and that the OA is an experience that few get to undergo. Some would say, "Lucky them." I would say, "Lucky me."

Like a lot of people, I've thought all my life about joining the Foreign Service. What stopped me? A fear of failure. An absolute certainty that I'd never pass the Foreign Service Oficer Test. And then, later, practicality stopped me. I was overseas and nowhere near a testing center. Now, there sees to be a conjoining of circumstances that not only enables but supports my application. I have no professional commitments. My children are nearly grown and certainly ready for adventure. I'm single, so I don't have to worry about affecting a husband's career.

If I don't pass the OAs, then what? I'll get on with my life -- and still be happy that I took part in the experience.

Anything can happen the day of the Orals to affect your performance. Several people have said they lucked up by being with a wonderful group of people for their Group Exercise. They had no difficult or combative personalities in the group. Everyone wanted to work together and did. Another guy said he failed because of nerves. He was so wound up, so worried about failing, that he couldn't sleep the night before. He woke up exhausted, physically as well as mentally.

Now, I'm sure I'll sleep well the night before. Don't ask me why, but I'm sure I will. Other people are worried about oversleeping. They start practicing going to sleep early and waking up at 5 a.m. several days before the OA, so that they can used to a new rhythm. The thing is, I already fall asleep fairly early and between kids and cats, I've been waking up and getting up between 5:30 a.. and 6 a.m. for nearly twenty years. So I'm not too worried about it. However, there's no need to be overly confident, so I'm planning on lots of having a couple of alarm clocks around!

If only getting sleep/waking up were my main issue!

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